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- 02:46, 26 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Lawyer has some good and some bad news (Created page with "Lawyer tells his client, "I have some good news and some bad news." "What's the bad news?" asks the client. "The bad news is, your blood is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it." "What's the good news?" "Your cholesterol is 130." Category:Lawyer Jokes Category:Medical Jokes")
- 20:56, 23 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page A Bronze Rat (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sent Wednesday, August 13, 2003 Received from Joke du Jour / via: gcfl.net </pre> A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs. "Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and a thousand dollars more for the st...")
- 00:37, 22 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Fathers of 1900s and fathers of today (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sent Friday, June 13, 2003 Received from andychaps_the-funnies / via: gcfl.net </pre> In 1900, fathers prayed their children would learn English. Today, fathers pray their children will speak English. - In 1900, if a father put a roof over his family's head, he was a success. Today, it takes a roof, deck, pool, and 4-car garage. And that's just the vacation home. - In 1900, a father waited for the doctor to tell him when the baby arrived. Today, a fat...")
- 02:14, 21 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page An accountant dies and goes to Heaven (Created page with "An accountant dies and goes to Heaven. He is met by St Peter who goes through the usual questionnaire. "What sort of accountant are you?" says St Peter. "I work in private practice," is the reply. "Name?" He gives his name. St Peter goes through some files and pulls one out. "Oh, yes. We've been expecting you. You've reached your allotted span," says St Peter. "How can that be?" says the accountant. "I'm too young to go. I'm only forty-eight" "No, that's impossibl...")
- 02:45, 20 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Eternal youth tablets (Created page with "<pre> Received from Thomas Ellsworth / via: gcfl.net Date: Sent Thursday, October 10, 2019 </pre> The police recently arrested a man selling "secret formula" tablets he claimed gave eternal youth. When going through their files they noticed it was the fifth time he was caught for committing this same criminal medical fraud. He had earlier been arrested in 1794, 1856, 1928 and 1983! Category:Jokes from 2019 Category:Medical Jokes Category:People Jokes")
- 02:09, 19 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page A tall weather-worn cowboy walked into the saloon (Created page with "Date: Sat, 9 Jul 1994 19:30 From: markp@microsoft.com (Mark Pennington) Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny <i>Not an original joke, but forwarded to me by my friend Mike who had it forwarded to him, etc.</i> A tall weather-worn cowboy walked into the saloon and ordered a beer. The regulars quietly observed the drifter through half-closed eyelids. No one spoke, but they all noticed that the stranger's hat was made of brown wrapping paper. Less obvious was the fact that his s...")
- 01:47, 18 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Looking for Chief Financial Officer (Created page with "An accountant from Cork applies for the position of Chief Financial Officer. There are a number of candidates and he is called in for an interview. They ask him a number of questions and one of the panel suddenly says "What is nine multiplied by four?" He thinks quickly and says "Thirty five." When the interview is over he goes outside, takes out his calculator and finds the correct answer is not thirty five. He thinks “Well, I blew that” and goes home very disappo...")
- 01:45, 18 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page How much is 2 plus 2? (Created page with "There once was a business owner who was interviewing people for a divisional manager position. He decided to select the individual that could answer the question: "How much is 2+2?". The journalist answered "22 period". The social worker said "I don’t know the answer but I’m glad you have raised this important question". The engineer pulled out his slide rule and shuffled it back and forth, and finally announced "It lies between 3.98 and 4.02". The mathematician...")
- 01:42, 18 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page What does CPA stand for? (Created page with "An irish accountant is talking to the young child of one of his friends and says, "Do you know what I do?" "Daddy says you’re a CPA." "That’s right. Did he tell you what CPA stands for?" "Well, he says you’re a complete pain in the arse." Category:Ethnic Jokes Category:Finance Jokes Category:Irish Jokes")
- 01:40, 18 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Martian invader about to destroy Dublin (Created page with "A Martian lands to plunder, pillage and burn in Dublin. He goes up to the owner of the first house he sees and says, “I’m a Martian just arrived from the other side of the galaxy. We’re here to destroy your civilisation, pillage and burn. What do you think about that?” The owner replies, “I don’t have an opinion. I’m a chartered accountant." Category:Ethnic Jokes Category:Finance Jokes Category:Irish Jokes")
- 02:52, 17 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page A Lost Transcript from "Star Trek: The Next Generation" (Created page with "<pre> Date: Fri, 1 Jul 1994 19:35 From: nathan@hal.com (Nathan Hoover) Subject: A Lost Transcript from "Star Trek: The Next Generation" </pre> Picard: "Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding a weakness in the Borg? And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their command pathways?" Geordi: "Yes, Captain. In fact, we found the answer by searching through our archives on late Twentieth-century computing technology." Geordi presses a key, an...")
- 01:04, 16 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Category:Ethnic Jokes (Created page with "Ethnic jokes are a form of humor that relies on stereotypes about specific ethnic groups. These jokes often highlight perceived cultural differences, behaviors, or traits, and can sometimes be used to mock or belittle the targeted group. While many people may find them funny, it's important to recognize that ethnic jokes can perpetuate harmful stereotypes and contribute to prejudice and discrimination. It's always best to be mindful of the impact such jokes can have on...")
- 01:00, 16 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page The First Parent (Created page with "Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to his kids. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. The first thing God said to them was: "Don't!" "Don't what?" Adam asked. "Don't eat the forbidden fruit," said God. "Forbidden fruit? Really? Where is it?" Adam and Eve asked, jumping up and down excitedly. "It's over there," said God, wondering why he hadn't stopped after maki...")
- 00:53, 16 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Dead minister at the gates of heaven (Created page with "A renowned and very well respected minister died. A short time later, another equally respected colleague died, and found himself on the stairway to Heaven. He was given a bag of chalk and told to write, one on each step, of the sins he had committed. After many hundred of steps he noticed his predecessor was waliking dowh the stairs. Enquiringly he asked "Have you finished and have now been permitted to Enter the Kingdom?" The reply was "No, I am on my way down for s...")
- 00:05, 16 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Two teachers breaking up (Created page with "Question: Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? Answer: Because there was no chemistry. Category:People Jokes")
- 23:50, 15 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Category:Blonde Jokes (Created page with "Blonde jokes are a type of humor that often play on stereotypes about people with blonde hair, typically portraying them as less intelligent or naive. These jokes have been around for centuries, originating from satirical depictions of blonde women in the 1700s. While they can be funny, it's important to remember that they are based on outdated and unfair stereotypes. The intention behind these jokes is usually light-hearted, but they can be offensive if taken serious...")
- 21:53, 15 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Catholic school cafeteria (Created page with "In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take one. God is watching." Further down the line is a pile of cookies. A little boy makes his own note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples." Category:Religion Jokes")
- 21:51, 15 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Is eating carrots good for your eyes? (Created page with ""Doctor, is it really true that eating carrots make your eyes work better?" (or ... improves ones eyesight") "Of course, have You seen any rabbits, wearing glasses?" Category:Animal Jokes Category:Medical Jokes")
- 01:21, 14 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page The King in outer space (Created page with "<pre>Date: Mon, 27 Aug 1990 12:36 From: bostic@okeeffe.Berkeley.EDU (Keith Bostic) Subject: The King in outer space </pre> ELVIS IN FREE FALL Some clever devil worked up a chart showing how much ELVIS PRESLEY would weigh at various sites in the solar system. The King tipped the scales at 255 when he died and, according to this chart, this means he would weigh about: <pre> 7,140 pounds on the Sun 97 pounds on Mercury or Mars 232 pounds on Venus or Uranus 43...")
- 20:05, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Scotsman at the expensive dentist (Created page with "A Scotsman goes to the dentist and asks how much it is for an extraction. "85 pounds for an extraction sir" was the dentists reply. "Och! huv ye nay got unythin cheaper", replies the Scotsman getting agitated. "But that's the normal charge for an extraction sir", said the dentist. "What aboot if ye didnae use uny anaesthetic?", asked the Scotsman hopefully. "Well it's highly unusual sir, but if that's what you want, I suppose I can do it for 70 pounds", said the den...")
- 20:03, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Scotsman returns from the dentist (Created page with ""Well, how was it? Painful?" "Yes, he pulled out two of my teeth." "But You had trouble only from one?" "He didn't have a change." Category:Ethnic Jokes Category:Scottish Jokes")
- 20:01, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Scottish wedding ring (Created page with ""Where is Your wedding ring?", asks one Scotshman from another. "Well lad, my wife is wearing it this week." Category:Ethnic Jokes Category:Scottish Jokes")
- 19:56, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page US Navy in Spain joke (Created page with "In the mid 80's a cruiser of the U.S. navy put in to port in Catahegna, Spain, for a week's shore leave. (Well, leave for the crew, not the cruiser.) The first evening, the captain was more than a little surprised to receive the following letter from an upper-class Spanish lady: "Dear Captain, On Thursday, it will be my daughter's coming of age party. I would like you to send four well-mannered, rich, unmarried officers. They should arrive at 8 p.m. - One last point:...")
- 10:50, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Handsome and irresistible (Created page with "A man and his wife were returning from a party one evening. As the couple was driving home, she asked her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?" Totally flattered, he replied: "No, dear they haven’t." At that point she yelled: "Then what the heck gave you THAT idea at the party tonight?" Category:People Jokes")
- 10:37, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Good Communication (Created page with "It was Friday night and Joseph and his wife, Natalie, had just gotten into their third argument of the day and were now giving each other the silent treatment, vowing not to be the first one to speak. However, at bedtime, Joseph realized that he would need his wife, who always woke up at 4:30am to wake him at 5:00am for golf with his friends. Not wanting to lose the battle of wills, Joseph wrote on a piece of paper: "Natalie, please wake me at 5:00am." The next morning...")
- 02:03, 11 March 2025 Joker talk contribs created page Why did the blonde move to L.A.? (Created page with "Why did the blonde move to L.A.? I don't know. Why? It was easier to spell. Easier than what? category:Blonde Jokes")
- 01:54, 11 March 2025 User account Joker talk contribs was created