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30 August 2025

  • 11:4311:43, 30 August 2025 Fire has destroyed the personal library of US President (hist | edit) [543 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: 20-02-2003 Posted to boards.ie by Wook </pre> Washington, DC (Räuters) Tragic and sad news from the White House. Fire has destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. Both of his books have been lost. The president is reportedly devastated - apparently, he had not finished coloring the second one. <hr> <i>This is a truly timeless joke ... fast forward a decade or 2 and you can easily replace Bush with Biden or Trump, and the joke still w...")
  • 11:2811:28, 30 August 2025 George W. Bush Quotes (hist | edit) [2,559 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: 29-01-2003 Posted to Boards.ie by woosaysdan <pre> All quotes 100% authentic, and courtesey of George W. Bush. <ul> <li>"I think we can agree. The past is over." <li>"I have learned from mistakes I may or may not have made." <li>"It was just inebreating what the Midlands was all about then." (A slip on exhillerating) <li>"It's clearly the budget. It has a lot of numbers on it." <li>"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case." <l...")

29 August 2025

  • 16:0216:02, 29 August 2025 Ex marine working as a teacher (hist | edit) [800 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: 29th August 2025 Spotted on FB </pre> A former Marine Corps Sergeant took a job as a high school teacher. Right before the school year started, he injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast under his shirt. The students didn’t know. On the first day, he walked into the noisiest, rowdiest class in the school - the kind that eats new teachers alive. The kids, knowing he was a former Marine, were already planning to test him. The Sergeant calmly open...")
  • 16:0116:01, 29 August 2025 What is your favourite animal (hist | edit) [1,217 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: 26th August 2025 Spotted on FB </pre> Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed. My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA. He said they love animals ... very much. I do, too. Especially chicken, pork and b...") originally created as "What is your favourite animal?"

28 August 2025

  • 22:0122:01, 28 August 2025 How to keep a healthy level of insanity and drive other people insane (hist | edit) [1,824 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: 03-04-2003 Posted to Boards.ie by Dempsey </pre> <ol> <li>At lunchtime, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. <li>Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.) <li>Insist that your e mail address be: 'xena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com' or 'Elvis-the-king@companyname.com' <li>Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. <li>Encourage your colleagues to join...")

23 August 2025

  • 20:1820:18, 23 August 2025 The dog and the lion (hist | edit) [854 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: 23rd August 2025 Spotted on FB </pre> A lost dog strays into the jungle. A lion spots him and thinks, "Hmm ... I have never seen this creature before, but he looks edible." The lion charges toward him. The dog panics, then notices some bones nearby. Thinking quickly, he shouts loudly: "Wow, that was some good lion meat!" The lion freezes. "Whoa! This guy’s tougher than he looks. Better get out of here while I can." Up in the tree, a monkey saw the whol...")

19 August 2025

  • 07:2907:29, 19 August 2025 Cheap clothes from the UK (hist | edit) [1,001 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Tue, 19 Aug 2025 Spotted on FB </pre> Two Irish lads are strolling down a street in Liverpool, England, when they spot a shop window that reads: "Suits £10, Jackets £7.50, Trousers and Dresses £5.00." One turns to the other and says, "Would ya look at those feckin' prices? We could buy a boatload, haul it back to Ireland, and make a fortune — double, maybe even treble the money!" The other lad says, "That’s a grand idea, but d’ya think they’ll s...")

27 July 2025

  • 12:0512:05, 27 July 2025 A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar (hist | edit) [632 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sun, 02 Oct 1994 From: Brian Cyr / S29208%MOTHER@UTRCGW.UTC.COM </pre> A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender: <p> Brunette: "I'll have a B and C."<br> Bartender: "What is a B and C?".<br> Brunette: "Bourbon and Coke."<br> Redhead: "And, I'll have a G and T."<br> Bartender: "What's a G and T?"<br> Redhead: "Gin and tonic."<br> Blonde: "I'll have a 15."<br> Bartender: "What's a 15?"<br> Blonde: "7 and 7" <hr> <i>7&7 is ba...")
  • 12:0112:01, 27 July 2025 What's the difference between a Blonde and a lightbulb (hist | edit) [306 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sun, 02 Oct 1994 From: Brian Cyr / S29208%MOTHER@UTRCGW.UTC.COM </pre> Q: What's the difference between a Blonde and a lightbulb? <br> A: The lightbulb is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on. Category:Blonde Jokes Category:Lightbulb Jokes Category:Jokes from 1994") originally created as "What's the difference between a Blonde and a lightbulb?"
  • 11:5911:59, 27 July 2025 How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb (hist | edit) [855 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sat, 02 Mar 1996 From: Rhiannon Walker / rhiannon@COUGAR.MULTILINE.COM.AU / Starchild </pre> Q: How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? <p> A: Four hundred and sixty-two: <ul> <li>twelve to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old bulb, <li>twenty-three to deregulate the light bulb industry, <li>sixteen to cut funding for alternative lighting R&D, <li>thirty-four to cut the tax rate on light bulbs, <li>fi...") originally created as "How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
  • 11:5011:50, 27 July 2025 Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist (hist | edit) [302 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Thu, 21 Jun 2001 From: JokeCenter / http://www.jokecenter.com/ </pre> Q. What do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common? <br> A. They both have the same middle name — <b>THE</b> Category:Religion Jokes Category:Jokes from 2001 Category:Puns and Wordplay Jokes Category:Short Jokes")
  • 11:4311:43, 27 July 2025 Old Lady at the grocery store (hist | edit) [406 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Tue, 15 May 2001 From: Les Pourciau / Pourciau@MEMPHIS.EDU </pre> A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. <p> She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" <p> The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead." </p> Category:Dark Humor Category:Jokes from 2001 Category:Short Jokes")
  • 11:4111:41, 27 July 2025 Mice in a cave (hist | edit) [611 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Tue, 20 Jan 1998 From: Jim Mica / jmica@oa.ithaca.edu </pre> <i>Bill Stains (noted folksinger and songwriter) tells this one:</i> <hr> Two mice are being chased across a field by a wolf. <p> They duck into a small space between a couple of rocks and find themselves in a large cave. As their eyes get used to the dim light one of them looks up at the high ceiling and sees that it's covered with bats. <p> He tugs on his companion's shoulder and says, "Look! A...")
  • 11:3811:38, 27 July 2025 Science facts about reindeer (hist | edit) [831 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Tue, 19 Dec 2000 From: Maurizio Mariotti / mariotti@VENTURENET.CO.ZA </pre> <p> According to the Alaska Department of Fish & Game, while both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year (the only members of the deer family, Cervidae, to have females that do so), male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid December. Female reindeer retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring....")
  • 10:3710:37, 27 July 2025 A Very Special Rat (hist | edit) [1,335 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Fri, 12 Mar 2025 From: FaceBook </pre> A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a wild trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender shrugs, "Sure, why not?" The guy reaches into his pocket and pulls out ... a tiny rat. Then out of the other pocket, he pulls a teeny-tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and starts playing the blues like a rodent Ray Charles. Stunned, the bartender pours him a free drink. After...")

19 July 2025

5 July 2025

  • 16:3816:38, 5 July 2025 Political Computer Virus Alert (hist | edit) [1,402 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sun, 06 Nov 1994 From: John Marra Naturalized Yooper / S20D@NMU.EDU </pre> <ul> <li><b>George Bush Virus</b> - Doesn't do anything, but you can't get rid of it until November.<br><br> <li><b>Ted Kennedy Virus</b> - Crashes your computer but denies it ever happened.<br><br> <li><b>Warren Commission Virus</b> - Won't allow you to open your files for 75 years.<br><br> <li><b>Jerry Brown Virus</b> - Blanks your screen and begins flashing an 800 number.<br><br> <...")

28 June 2025

  • 01:3901:39, 28 June 2025 Bill Clinton at a baseball game (hist | edit) [832 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Fri, 20 Aug 1993 From: Arthur Emerson III / ae3@CTS1.MSMC.EDU </pre> <i>(A joke that I heard on the radio this morning.)</i> <hr> President Clinton and his family went out one evening to a baseball game. When the home team's catcher heard that the president was sitting in the stands, he went over to Bill and whispered something in his ear. <p> Bill smiled and nodded. A few minutes later, the catcher came over and said "It's time, Mr. President." <p> Bill lif...")
  • 01:3101:31, 28 June 2025 What kind of unredwear politicians have (hist | edit) [687 bytes] Joker (talk | contribs) (Created page with "<pre> Date: Sun, 04 Aug 1996 From: Eric Clark / klucko@COMPUMEDIA.COM </pre> Many of us have heard the story of the time in 1992 when Clinton went on MTV and some girl asked him "America is <i>_dying_</i> to know: "Is it boxers, or briefs?"" <p> The candidate then feigned embarrassment and said "Boxers." <p> In 1995, some guy decided to ask Speaker Newt the same question. Newt appropriately answered back "That was a stupid question." <p> This year, someone decided tha...") originally created as "What kind of unredwear politicians have?"

25 June 2025

7 June 2025

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